Dating is hard enough in 2022.
Dating with a Chronic illness, (in the beginning) feels like a mountain to overcome.
That being said, I have had quite a number of dates since being diagnosed with Crohn’s Disease.
I always think honesty is the best policy and I tend to bring up the fact I have Crohn’s Disease very early on- sometimes even on the first date. If they don’t think they can handle that fact (or in some cases, not wanting to handle that situation) I don’t want to waste either of our times.
Its super scary disclosing something so personal and so misunderstood to others. Its a lot of explaining and while I tend to go off on a tangent, those who want to know and understand, stick around.
I’ve had some bad experiences where men have ghosted me and told me that I should’t talk about it because its disgusting.
I’ve also had some really good situations too where my dates are supportive and understanding. They will work with me, if I suddlenly get sick before our date or if I am not well enough for what we have planned.
I have learned that those who are open minded are going to love you for you, no matter what. They will ask you questions not out of malice, but out of curiosity to help them understand how they can help you.
Being lighthearted about some awkward situations helps a lot too. Being able to laugh in the middle of a awkward situation, helps tremendously.
I did a quick google search about dating with IBD and it pulled up 1.89 million results. Most of them are from medical based websites- Webmd, Mayo Clinic etc. What surprised me the most was the articles from Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health and Thought Catalog. This blog post about 20 reasons to date a guy with Crohn’s Disease can also be applied for a girl with Crohn’s Disease. The Mighty, is a website that is one of my favorites for great heart warming stories but a Crohn’s Blogger, Natalie Hayden, wrote a very cute article on online-dating with Crohn’s Disease. There are so many stories out there and so may people who have had such diverse experiences with Crohn’s Disease and it’s really neat how the internet can bring all those people together.
My take-aways for dating with Crohn’s Disease:
1. Be Honest
2. Be yourself
3. Don’t settle
Check out past Crohn’s Confidential posts below:
Crohn’s Confidential: My Crohn’s Disease Journey
Crohn’s Confidential: My Support Team and How They Help Me
Crohn’s Confidential: Surgery: Before & After
Crohn’s Confidential: Recovery After Surgery
Crohn’s Confidential: World IBD Day
Crohn’s Confidential: Dealing with Questions and Comments
Crohn’s Confidential: What I learned from Crohn’s Disease
Crohn’s Confidential: Resources
Crohn’s Confidential: Thank you
Crohn’s Confidential: Humira Update
[[You’re not the girl who settles. ]]
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